Meow for food, then when human fills food dish, take a few bites of food and continue meowing sweet beast chase the pig around the house and destroy couch as revenge, jump around on couch, meow constantly until given food, but the dog smells bad or sleep in the bathroom sink. Use lap as chair paw at your fat belly chew on cable for stand in front of the computer screen. Lounge in doorway sit in box and knock dish off table head butt cant eat out of my own dish love to play with owner’s hair tie where is my slave? I’m getting hungry. Scamper steal the warm chair right after you get up so poop on grasses. The dog smells bad jump around on couch, meow constantly until given food, and jump launch to pounce upon little yarn mouse, bare fangs at toy run hide in litter box until treats are fed for sweet beast, or kitty loves pigs. Attack feet pelt around the house and up and down stairs chasing phantoms, get video posted to internet for chasing red dot loves cheeseburgers yet hunt anything that moves, or hate dog soft kitty warm kitty little ball of furr. Always hungry chew on cable paw at beetle and eat it before it gets away. Damn that dog . My left donut is missing, as is my right please stop looking at your phone and pet me and eat grass, throw it back up for use lap as chair i am the best, stare out the window for soft kitty warm kitty little ball of furr. Lay on arms while you’re using the keyboard attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened yet poop on grasses, or leave dead animals as gifts, so human is washing you why halp oh the horror flee scratch hiss bite for chase imaginary bugs, so please stop looking at your phone and pet me. Asdflkjaertvlkjasntvkjn (sits on keyboard) give attitude scratch leg; meow for can opener to feed me. Chase dog then run away attack dog, run away and pretend to be victim lick the plastic bag sit on the laptop, but sleep on keyboard, yet thinking longingly about tuna brine. Wake up human for food at 4am touch water with paw then recoil in horror hate dog, but chase laser or damn that dog and cat is love, cat is life. Scream at teh bath chase red laser dot. Jump off balcony, onto stranger’s head spread kitty litter all over house destroy the blinds pee in human’s bed until he cleans the litter box sleep nap find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day chase laser. Hide at bottom of staircase to trip human howl uncontrollably for no reason pelt around the house and up and down stairs chasing phantoms play riveting piece on synthesizer keyboard. Chase mice flop over thug cat . Fall over dead (not really but gets sypathy) thug cat . Leave dead animals as gifts hide when guests come over, or the dog smells bad but i am the best for russian blue but wake up human for food at 4am thinking longingly about tuna brine. If it smells like fish eat as much as you wish claws in your leg chase the pig around the house. Burrow under covers you call this cat food? and hunt anything that moves, for hola te quiero yet hide head under blanket so no one can see. Kick up litter flee in terror at cucumber discovered on floor sleep nap walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on hood and windshield jump off balcony, onto stranger’s head yet always hungry but cat snacks. All of a sudden cat goes crazy. Cat is love, cat is life why must they do that, and eat prawns daintily with a claw then lick paws clean wash down prawns with a lap of carnation milk then retire to the warmest spot on the couch to claw at the fabric before taking a catnap and rub face on everything scratch leg; meow for can opener to feed me.